Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Do you trust Me?

I've had a lot of things running through my head latley. So much so that it's been very hard to hear from God. Hence the fact that I haven't written in a while.

I want to share with you what I've been struggling with..

It's been just about a month since God put on my heart to quit my job. I greatly dislike my job so at first I thought it was just me having a bad day and that the next day would be better..but no, God kept putting on my heart to quit my job. I started praying for confirmation and had two of my sweet sisters pray for this as well and for the last month confirmation has been chasing me down. Every where I go, everything I do God speaks about quitting my job. My heart wanted to believe that this was from God but my mind says anything can be made in to a confirmation if we really want it to - and believe me I wanted it to be true.

About 2 weeks ago I felt like God was telling me to wait - my spirit echoed this but then my mind said it was just me being scared of the unknown.

You probably understand my struggle by now. Sunday/Monday was my turning point. God finally got ahold of me and wrestled my doubts to the ground. Thank you Father.

Sunday at Church I just cried out to Him, I just took that leap and said Daddy I need you! Help me, I need Your answers!!

Do you trust Me? He spoke to me so clearly in my heart I felt like He was standing right in front of me holding me.

Wow. Do I trust Him. My answer is yes of course...but do I really? We are broke, my husband isn't working right now except for a weekly workman's comp check, do I really trust Him to provide for us? Do I trust that whatever He has for us will provide for all of our bills without my income? Well Lord, when You put it like that, maybe I don't trust You as much as I should. He's asking me to take a leap of faith and TRUST Him that He won't let me or my family fall. He's proven to me time and time again that He has our lives in His control so why can't I let go?

So I have been praying A LOT. Seeking God's will..A LOT. I don't know what comes next but I want what God has for me and my family so I'm going to keep praying about this. I told God that I would quit my job, all He has to tell me is when so now I wait for His answers and I pray.

He told me all I had to do was say yes and He would take care of the rest. He will make a way. It's like a really BIG God sized present just waiting to be opened.

I trust You Father, and I say yes. I am now and forever Yours.


Jenifer said...

Great post Mandy. It can be so scary to face the unknown. But we do not have to know, because God does! He will not let you down. All He wants is obedience. Love you!

Kelli said...

What an awesome testimony and journey of faith. We want to be strong but we dont want the trials....but we cant have both. This makes perserverance and with that makes us mature and complete not lacking in anything. You may feel like you are lacking right now, but in the end you wont need or long for anything! You encourage me so much to keep my eyes patiently on Him in the "hard to wait" times. Ill be praying for yall!:)

Heidi said...

I so know where you are coming from! It's hard to take the unknown leap into major life change especially when you're uncertain if you're hearing His voice or your own. It seems like you're beginning to hear Him now though... I am praying for you and I've missed your words here :)

Mandy said...

Thank you for praying for me ladies, I appreciate it :) God is doing a mighty work and sometimes we just have to wait for Him to say go and then go. It's not easy but with prayer God helps us wait.

******Shelly****** said...

I understand and know how difficult it can be. We went through a similar situation the end of last year and are still learning to trust completely. I am saying a prayer for you today!

Deane said...

It seems we sometimes really need a knock in the head to know that it is God talking to us. I believe He understands how we feel, that we are afraid to take that big leap into the unknown. He also knows we want to do what He wants us to do. He just wants us to know He is there to help us through this big leap. I will be praying for you. God bless you.

Lisa said...

Saying Yes to God can be scary, but we know He is holding us always. He wants our full obedience. God always has a plan and He will always provide. We're on a wild journey, but it's all gonna be worth it!

Allison said...

What a decision and what courage you have to step out in faith and trust Him. He'll take care of you...praying that you'll find peace and the right path for you..

Phather Phil Malmstrom said...

This was a wonderfully heartfelt and transparent post Mandy. Stepping outside our comfort zone and trusting Him completely can be absolutely terrifying, especially when you have that little voice inside your head second guessing the source of your decision. Have no fear though, he knows your heart and has promised that if we honestly seek Him, he will never leave us.

"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." - Isaiah 40:31

My prayers are with you and your family.

Have a Blessed Day!

Bryan said...

As I read your post, I thought of the Scripture that shares, "God owns the cattle on a thousand hills." And in reality, He owns everything, and thankfully as Father, He shares and meets our needs according to His riches in glory.
I'm praying for you...

Demetria Spencer said...

I know how you feel, girl! I have been facing a lot of struggles lately too. I hope you get more from what God is showing you soon. And I hope I get my to my own peace with him as well.